Down the road from where I live, there is a public toilet, a small standalone building. I was walking near it yesterday when I saw a man waiting outside it. He was looking flustered, so I said to him, "Are you okay, mister?"
"No!" he said, "I've been waiting here for flipping ages, and my bladder is ready to burst."
"Are you sure there's someone in there?" I asked.
"Yeah, you can see that the door is locked. And it's two blokes who are in there, probably having gay sex..."
"LOL"
"Damnit!" said the man, "This is exactly like a cup I'm waiting for at TUS, an Intermediate cup."
"You're a worms player?" I asked, shocked.
"Yeah, old school. Listen, I know we have to wait coz of the ten cups rule, but why did the mods open that darts cup before the inter one?"
"Dunno."
At this point, the man lost his nerve. "f@#! this!" he shouted, "I will wait no more!" And on that note, he started to piss his pants.
"Hey," I said, "what are you doing?"
"I'm not waiting for that cup, and I'm not waiting for that toilet either."
A dark patch of urine spread outwards over the groin area of his trousers, and ran down the insides of his legs.
"So if the cup opened right now, you wouldn't play?" I said.
"Correct," he said quietly. Then he started crying.
The toilet door opened and two men came out, a fat man in an expensive suit and a younger man whose trousers were sagging.
"Aw," they said to the crying worms player, "there, there." They gave him a group hug. Then they walked away.
I walked away too, thinking to myself, "Has it come to this? A man has just deliberately pissed his own pants because he was made to wait too long for a TUS cup, and the only people who cared about it were a couple of random gays. What kind of world do we live in?"
Cups
